SHIN SEIKI
''zankoku na tenshi no youni''
''shoonen yo shinwa ni nare''
''aoi kaze ga ima mune no DOOR wo tataitemo''
''watashidake wo tada mitsumete hohoenderu anata''
''sotto fureru mono motomeru koto ni muchuude''
''unmei sae mada shiranai itaike na hitomi''
''dakedo itsuka kizuku deshou sono senaka niwa''
''haruka mirai mezasu tame no hane ga aru koto''
''zankoku na tenshi no THESE ~ madobe kara yagate tobitatsu''
''hotobashiru atsui PATHOS ~ de omoide wo uragiru nara''
''kono sora wo daite kagayaku shoonen yo shinwa ni nare''
It was 2016 A.D.
The thing people lost,
in other words, the complementation of the mind is unfolding.
However, there's too little time to describe the entire process.
Therefore, we will discuss the complementation of the mind of
one single boy named Ikari Shinji.
Case 3: In the case of Ikari Shinji.
Fear
That I disappear.
Yet, I can disappear because I feel that I am useless.
Why?
Because I am useless.
After all, I am a useless child.
Nobody cares about me.
You run away considering nobody cares about you.
You fear to fail.
You fear to be disliked.
You fear to see the weakness within you.
You too!
Right. We are the same.
Our mind lacks something.
So we fear it.
So we worry about it.
So we are trying to be one.
We are trying to complement by the instrumentality of each other.
That's the instrumentality project.
One cannot live without being surrounded by others.
One cannot live alone.
One is always unique.
Causing hardship.
Causing sadness.
Causing the wish to feel anothers' mind and body.
Causing the wish to become one.
A human is made of weak and fragile materials.
The mind and body are also made of weak and fragile materials.
So it is necessary to complement by the instrumentality of each other.
Why?
There's no other way to live.
Is that true?
Why do you live?
I've no idea.
I might live to know why.
For whom do you live?
Obviously, for me.
Probably for myself.
Is that true?
You enjoy your life?
I wonder.
You enjoy your life?
Of course yes.
You enjoy your life?
I don't want to do anything not enjoyable.
You dislike to be sad?
I don't like that.
You dislike hardships?
I don't like that.
So you run away.
Yes. Do you blame for running away from something I hate?
I won't run away.
Why won't you run away.
If I ran away, it would be more painful.
You ran away from something painful.
It was painful.
If you know the pain, then everything's OK.
You may run away if it's painful.
You can run away from something you truly hate.
Yet, I don't. I don't want to run away.
No. I shall not run away.
It's because you already know that running away will be more painful.
You know how painful it is to run away.
So you don't want to run away.
I said, if I ran away, nobody would care about me.
Don't desert me! Please! Don't desert me!
Obeying the words of others, that's his way to live.
Right! Otherwise, I would be deserted.
You fear to be hurt.
You are trying to think so.
Not only you but also others are hurt.
Everybody feels hardships.
You think so, because it's easier for you.
Shut up! That has nothing to do with me.
People don't care about me.
And you always desert your value.
I have nothing.
And you try to think yourself valueless.
Thinking that, doing nothing, one would not be hurt.
People try to keep themselves by being praised.
Nobody accepts me.
You are trying to think so.
So, I have to pilot Eva.
You've been trying to think yourself valueless since the very begining.
I have to do so.
No, it's not so.
You are trying to think so, anyway.
I am valueless. I have nothing to be proud of.
So you pilot Eva.
Piloting Eva lets me be myself.
Before piloting Eva, I had nothing.
The fact that I pilot Eva lets me stay here.
I have nothing else.
I have nothing. NOTHING.
The value to live?
No, I don't have that.
THUS,
I hate myself.
I hate you! I hate you!
Me hate you.
I hate everything about you.
Sorry, but I hate you.
I hate you.
I hate everything about you.
I hate everything you are.
I hate you!
Now, everybody hates me.
People probably hate me.
You are trying to think so.
NO. Because I hate myself.
So, you are trying to think that others hate you.
I hate, I hate I hate you!
But, I am praised.
I am praised when I pilot Eva.
I was praised.
So, happy.
I was praised by people!
But, not happy.
Which is your true mind?
I don't know, or, both of them are my true minds.
So you pilot Eva.
I have nothing but Eva.
Otherwise you cannot keep yourself?
It's true that Eva Unit One is part of your mind.
If you depend on Eva too much,
Eva itself will be yourself.
Eva will be all of yourself.
The true yourself will be nowhere.
It's OK. I've had nothing from the begining.
I've been learning cello, but got no results.
You just didn't discipline yourself.
But, now that I can pilot Eva...
No, when you lose Eva, you can do nothing, like me.
Why do you pilot Eva?
Because it's all of me.
The Beast that Shouted "I" at the Heart of the World
Rain, gloomy mood, just like my mood. I don't like that.
The sinking sun, fading life, my hope. I don't like that.
Morning, the beginning of today, the beginning of
a bad day. I don't like that.
Blue sky. Something warm, something unusual,
something horrible. Something useless. I don't like that.
I hate everybody!
What do you hope for?
Hate anxiety?
What do you need?
Hate peace?
What do you want?
Don't hate me!
What I fear is,
Rejection
What I need is,
Contact and Approval
May I stay by you?
May I stay here?
Do you love me?
Your Mother,
Do you love her?
You want to go to your mom's place?
No, I don't.
Don't you want to go to your dad's place?
No, I don't.
Why not?
Because I fear.
I fear to be hated.
Because I would disappear.
So what?
What do you wish for?
To erase anxiety.
What do you need?
To erase sadness.
You're not happy are you?
For that, I need.. I need my value.
In order to be appreciated, in order not to be deserted,
I need my VALUE.
That is what you must admit by yourself.
You must admit your own value.
So you pilot Eva.
I don't have any value.
I don't have the value worth living.
Then, what are you?
Then what am I?
What the hell am I?
What? it's me.
The shape that I show to others...
The symbol representing Shinji
So, one needs the blockade of mind?
This, and this, and this, all these are the representation of me.
Nothing but the things that make others recognize me.
What am I?
This is me? The true me? The false me?
You are you. Yet, you have your own region and border.
Let's see. My clothes, my shoes, my room.
Those are part of myself.
The things linked together by your will.
The thing that I think myself, that is me.
I am nothing but myself.
Yet, I don't understand. Where am I?
What am I? What am I?
Nobody understands me.
You idiot! That's obvious!
Nobody ever understands you.
The one that takes care of you, and the one
that understands you is nobody but yourself.
So, take care of yourself.
But still I don't have myself, so I don't understand myself.
There's no way to take care of myself.
You are unstable.
You are still unstable.
The present you
The people around the present you.
The environment that surrounds the present you.
None of them last forever.
Your time is always flowing.
You are made of the changing world.
You are the thing that may change according to
your own mind.
What? The world with nothing. The world with nobody.
The world of freedom.
Freedom?
The world of freedom that would never be restrained by anybody.
Is this Freedom?
Yes. The world of freedom.
As a result, there's nothing.
Unless I think about it.
Yes, unless you think about it.
What the hell! I don't know what I should do.
You are uneasy.
You don't have your own image.
Too vague.
Everything is vague.
That's freedom.
The world in which you can do anything you like.
Yet, you are uneasy.
You don't you know what you should do.
What shall I do?
I give you a restriction.
Now you have a top and bottom.
Now you have lost one degree of freedom.
Now you have to stand on the bottom.
But you obtain a comfort.
You get slightly easier in your mind.
And you walk.
That is your will.
Is this my will?
The world with the bottom is the world surrounding you.
Yet, you can move freely.
If you wish, you can change the position of the world.
The world does not keep the same position.
That changes through the time flow.
You can also change.
The things that form you are your own mind and
the world surrounding yourself.
Since this is your own world.
The real figure that you conceive.
That is the reality.
This is the world with nothing, the space with nothing, the world with nothing.
The world with nothing but me.
I am less understanding myself.
I feel as if I am going to disappear.
My existence is fading away.
Why?
Because there's nobody but you.
Nobody but me?
Because you have no existence but that of yourself,
You can't figure out your own shape.
My shape?
My image?
Yes. You are getting to know your own shape through seeing the shapes of others.
Seeing the walls of others, you imagine yourself.
You cannot see yourself unless there are others.
Because there are others, I can exist.
If I'm alone, then I will be the same as everything else.
There will be no difference between myself and nothing..
By understanding the difference between you and others,
you form the image of yourself.
The very first other person is your mother.
Your mother is a different person from you.
Yes. I am I. Yet, it's true that others form the shape of my mind.
That's right, Ikari Shinji-kun.
Man, you took a long time to figure it out!
Stupid Shinji!
You wake up now. Stupid Shinji!
Oh, it's you, Asuka?
You say "It's you Asuka?."
Every morning, I come to wake you up so you won't be late for school.
Is that how you thank a childhood friend?
Ah... I mean thanks, so, let me sleep a little more.
What a lazy guy! Wake up! Wake up imediately.
Oh! NO! You, mean stupid horny guy! Unbelievable!
It's morning. It's natural.
Shinji is a lazy kid. He should be more grateful
that Asuka comes to wake him up.
Dear, you have to get ready too.
You're just like Shinji.
Are you ready?
Yes. It's always me who is scolded by Professor Fuyutsuki
when you are late for a meeting.
That's true, he's your biggest fan.
Stop saying stupid things. Change clothes!
hmmm, I see, Yui.
Hurry up!
OK, I know, you're such a pain in the ass sometimes!
What are you saying!
Now, I am off, Ma'am.
I am off.
Bye! Good luck.
Hey, how long are you going to keep reading?
hmmm, I see. Yui.
I hear that today we also have a newcomer.
Well, yes. This city will be the new capital city
after the capital transfer next year.
The population is increasing.
Right. What kinda girl? I hope it's a cute girl!
Phew.. Late for school! It's very bad to be late for
school from the very first day.
Oh, sorry, I am truly in a hurry.
I am very sorry.
Really! Then you saw it? I mean the girl's panty.
I did not intend to see but, only a moment,..
WOW, What a lucky boy you are this morning.
Ouch! What are you doing ?
Suzuhara, don't talk about such stupid things!
Hey, water the plants. You are on duty this week.
What a noisy girl..
What did you say?
He will be controlled after he gets married, Touji will.
You will as well.
How come you say I will be controlled?
YES. I told nothing but the truth.
Why?
You are what you appear to be.
Asuka, You are always talking ..
So peaceful..
Teacher Misato is coming!
Teacher Misato is looking real nice.
That trio of fools, They're real idiots.
Stand up. Bow. Sit down.
Boys be glad! Today, I'm going to introduce you to the transferee
everybody is talking about.
I am Ayanami Rei. Nice to meet you!
You! You are that stupid guy that peeped at my panty this morning.
NO, Stop! Don't say such a thing.
It's you that showed it to Shinji!
You moron, why do you cover that guy?
Are you guys dating?
No! We're just childhood friends.
Stop! It's school time. Be quiet!
Well, You seem to be enjoying yourselves. I am curious as well.
Go ahead.
I've got it. This is also a world.
A possiblity within me.
The me at the moment is not always the me as I am.
There are many selves.
Yes. There must be the me who is not the Eva pilot.
Thinking like that, the real world itself is not always bad.
The real world might not always be bad.
Yet, I hate myself.
It's your mind that conceives that the reality is bad and hateful.
The mind which confuses the reality with the truth.
The view angle, the position. If these are slightly different,
the things inside the mind will change a lot.
The truths are as many as people.
But there's only one truth that you have,
which is formed by a narrowed view of the world.
Formed by revised information to protect yourself,
the twisted truth.
Oh, yes. the view of the world that one can
have is quite small.
Yes, one measures things only by one's own small measure.
One sees things with the truth given by others.
Happy on a sunny day.
Gloomy on a rainy day.
If that's what you're taught, that's what you'll always think.
Even so, you may enjoy rainy days.
Your truth can be changed simply by the way you accept it.
That's how fragile truth is.
The truth within a human is so cheap that
people wish to know a deeper truth.
It's only that you are not used to be liked by people.
So, you don't have to look upon other's face.
Yet, don't you hate me?
You idiot! It's you that is always trying to think so.
Still, I hate myself.
Those who hate themselves cannot love or trust others.
I am wicked, a coward, weak and ..
If you know yourself, you can be kind to others.
I hate myself.
But, I might be able to love myself.
Maybe my life could have a greater value.
Yes. I am nothing but I.
I am I. I wish to be I.
I want to continue existing in this world!
I am worth living here!
Congratulations!
Take care!
Congratulations mister!
....
Congratulations!
Thank you!
Thank you, my father.
Good bye, my mother.
And to the all the children,
Congratulations!
A Moving Lines Production Timed and Subtitled by Vaz
Translated by Kentaro ONIZUKA
From the script captured by Kenji MATSUOKA